The Unmended Pieces

ashatteredheart @ 2005-05-21T14:58:00

2005-05-22T18:57:37Z

This is the end of LJ for me. It's been real, but, I'm out like Oprah in a bikini contest.

ashatteredheart @ 2005-05-18T18:18:00

2005-05-19T22:19:53Z

So, it's been for like fucking ever.

I have been working a lot. I got kind of behind on bills and things. I paid them, but didn't have any money to do shit else. I made it through though. Carpet has picked up a little bit, which makes me really happy. Since, this time around, I am not hourly, but on a percentage, I am working 10 times harder than what I was, because I know I am guarunteed the money. It's been nice really.

Things with Liz and Stacy are nuts. They argue constantly, but it is not my business. Even though, they both tell me, I am staying impartial.

Things in the apartment have been good. I need to clean my room, and rearrange it, but fuck it.

Other than all of that, even though, it's a real short version, nothing has been going on.

ashatteredheart @ 2005-05-11T21:54:00

2005-05-13T02:00:48Z

Thursday: Today fucking sucked. I got up, and had to go and get Russel Jr. because he was working with us. Well, that wasn't the bad part. We had 99 yards to do. Or at least we were supposed to. We get to the apartment, and it as gross. It smelled so bad, and there were dead termites, about a hundred of them, on the window. It was so gross. Allen almost puked. So, we left. They didn't have any more work for us.

Came home, and played video games for a bit. Took Lacey to Wal-Mart, and to Kroger, and then I went out to Best Buy, and bought the new Story of the Year cd/dvd that came out. Came home and watched that.

Started playing video games again, and then I got called downstairs. Lisa made a huge fucking cake, and her Mother made me some cabbage rolls. So, I ate the cabbage rolls, and went to Mom's house. She was watching movies, so I went to Francine's.

We talked about things with my father. He has called me, and has made it apparent that he wants something to do with me. I think I know the reason why he wasn't around. He and my Mom had a bad split, and he didn't want anything to do with her. Therefore, he didn't. If he would call wanting to talk to me, he would have to talk to her and she would always yell at him and make him feel worthless. Now, that I am out on my own, he doesn't have to deal with that.

So, who knows.

Lisa shaved my head. I ate a huge piece of cake. And now, I am watching tv.

Stacy hasn't called and wished me a happy birthday, but I am not real surprised. Hurt, but not surprised.

ashatteredheart @ 2005-05-10T19:13:00

2005-05-11T23:18:26Z

Monday: Was alright. Work was decent, it was a long day though. We had 236 yards and we didn't get it done. We were there until about 6. We could've gotten it done, but I just can't get the hang of putting pad down. It is the easiest concept ever, and I just can't fucking do it. I hate that fact that I can't, because if I could, me and Allen would be working about 2 hours less a day, and still making the same amount of money. Anyway, came home, watched wrestling, sleep.

Tuesday: Work was alright. Short day. All we did was finish the shit from yesterday. Allen and I then went to Golden Coral and had lunch. There food was actually really good. I still am not a big fan of that place. Anyway, went to Mom's house for spaghetti. She gave me a huge bowl of it to bring home. I gave it to the roomies. Tim and I went and played putt-putt tonight. He kicked my ass. After that, him and I talked seriously about a few things. Won't get into it though. I am thinking about re-arranging my room.

Wednesday: Another short day. 55 yards. Fucking sucks though. I need money bad. All my bills except rent are due in like the next week. I have the money to pay them, but it will be slim spending for the next week. When I got home, I went to Wal-Mart with Francine. She got Jesse a big kid pool, and some shit to grill out hamburgers and hot dogs. She sent me home a bunch load of leftovers too. Being poor is sweet. People give me free food now. Anyway, I need to burn a bunch of cd's for some people and re-arrange my room. But, I know I am not going to re-arrange my room. I might do that on Saturday. Other than that, I am bored.

ashatteredheart @ 2005-05-07T22:22:00

2005-05-09T02:29:26Z

Friday: Was alright. I woke up and laid in bed for a bit. Allen called and asked if I wanted to go to Chinese with him, so I did. I didn't eat a whole lot, just mostly Egg Drop Soup. After that, I didn't do much that I can remember. Probably played video games.

Saturday: Woke up at 2pm after not getting to sleep until like 5am. Showered, went and got Jay and Joey, and then onto the birthday party I went. I got 40dollars, and a pair of pajama pants. Not bad. Since Francine was broke and didn't get me anything, I made her wait on me and Jay hand and foot. It was sweet. Sat there and then came home, changed for work, and off I went. Chris didn't say anything to me about the whole situation going on with him, but I could tell that he and I aren't on a "friend" basis, which, is fine with me. I could care less. After work, we all went to Joe's. It was dumb. Chris was "tired." I think the next time I go over there, I am going to ask her why she doesn't like us anymore. She is fucking retarded. Came home, sleep.

Sunday: Woke up, and pryed myself out of bed. Showered, and went to Kroger. Got Mom a card, and a bottle of perfume, and dropped that off to her at work. Then, went to Francine's to wish her a happy mother's day, then came home, and did laundry. Played video games all day.

My throat is still really swollen. I don't know what the fuck. Everyone is like "go to the doctor." I don't have insurance, or money for the doctor. Fuck the doctor.

Liz and talked over the weekend. We are friends. She just said that when I told her I liked Stacy made her uncomfortable which is why she didn't like Stacy talking to me. I told her the reason I didn't like her was for the reason that she didn't like me talking to Stacy. So, we got that issue resolved.

Stacy and I have been talking on a more normal basis lately, and it fucking rules. Even though I bitch and complain about her a whole lot, she is still one of my best friends, and nothing could change that. Nothing.

ashatteredheart @ 2005-05-04T20:32:00

2005-05-06T00:51:02Z

Wednesday: Not a bad day, but a long one. We had to finish the job from yesterday, and then we had to work at 5:00pm until we got done. We got done at like 8 or so. Came home, and laid around. My throat is fucking killing me, and I have no idea why. Whatever, I am probably dying.

Thursday: Had work again. It was an occupied. Which sucks, but, it still went smooth.

When I got home, I went to Francine's where Mom and I get into it. She is fucking psycho. Then, Scott and I got into it because he finally figured out that I told Joe who told Tom about Chris smoking weed on the line. So, we got into it. He said he was going to let Chris kick my ass, and then Allen said while I will have to kick Chris's ass. Scott said he was on Chris's side, and Allen was like I will just kick your ass then too. Then, my Mom got this look in her eyes, and yelled and pointed at me "YOU GET OVER HERE NOW!" So took me into Francine's garage and told me about how she was tired of me disrespecting her, and just because I moved out doesn't make me better than her, and blah blah blah! I left. I slammed the garage door as hard as I could, and left. Fuck them. I don't need shit from either of them, but yet, they are taking their toll. They are seriously wearing me down emotionally. I can't fucking take it anymore.

Anyway, I have to work at Bolts on Saturday so that is going to be interesting. I am off on Friday, but plan on doing stuff with Lisa. Saturday, I have "my" birthday party to go to. Want to take Jay with me for that. Adam, if you really want to come, call me. Sunday, laundry. Monday thru Wednesday work. So far.

ashatteredheart @ 2005-05-02T20:42:00

2005-05-04T00:49:00Z

Monday: Most important thing is, I quite Meijer. Allen called me while I was out at lunch and offered me to come back and work for him for 30%. So, if he makes 1000$, I get 300%. It boils down to about 12$ an hour. But anyway, work sucked up until then. We had a product count of 35,000 and about 7 people didn't show up, so we were going to have mad overtime. But, I left at lunch.

Came home, and did much of nothing. Played video games, watched wrestling, and went to bed.

Tuesday: It was my first day back with Allen, and it was decent. 148 yards. We didn't finish it all because Allen wasn't feeling good, and now I think I am getting sick though. My throat is fucking killing me.

After work, I went back to Allen's and tried to help his girlfriend's daughter with algebra, and I couldn't remember how to do the thing she needed help with.

I came home, and layed on the couch. Lisa wants me to change Reeses' cage, but I am fucking tired, and I still need to shower. So, I think I am going to go and take care of all that.

Stacy called me last night, and her and Liz are having problems. Imagine that. I told her she needs to get away from her, but who knows what she will do. I am getting tired of telling her because she knows what she needs to do, she just won't do it.

ashatteredheart @ 2005-04-30T21:40:00

2005-05-02T01:43:00Z

Sunday: Today was alright. Woke up and did much of nothing. I woke up at 10:30am. I was a little pissed. I wanted to sleep until about noon today. Anyway, Connie and Larry had asked me to mow their grass today, so I did. It only took me like an hour, and they gave me 25 bucks for doing it.

After that, I went to Mcdonald's and got me and Lisa some food. Came home and ate. She had a headache. We watched some tv, and then she took a bath. After that, I started laundry. Still in the process of doing that.

Watched Family Guy! Funny shit.

Now, I need to finish laundry, shave, and shower. I have to work tomorrow, and since I have called off twice now, I need to go every day for a while. SUCK! I hate Meijer.

ashatteredheart @ 2005-04-30T21:21:00

2005-05-01T04:31:17Z

Friday night at Bolts was alright. I only made like 40 dollars in tips, but it was a slow night for a Friday. Afterwards, I came home, and Tim, Lisa, and I went to Meijer. I got shampoo, and deodorant. Tim bought a queen size air mattress.

He spent the night.

Saturday: Wasn't bad. I had the day off which is sweet. I woke up and Tim had made breakfast for Lisa earlier, and there were some leftovers, so I ate that. Then, I took a shower, and we all went to the movies and saw the Amityville Horror. Good fucking movie.

Then, I went to Mom's house for a bit, and then over to Francine's. She was going out tonight, and she asked if I knew of anything that was going on. I said yeah, because Remainer of 3 was playing tonight at Bolts. So, there we went. It was good times. Everyone had a good time, and no one got in arguments or nothing. That is a plus. Especially with my family.

Anyway, something has been bothering the shit out of me lately. I feel just wrong for liking Lisa. I feel like I am lying to Tim constantly because he doesn't know, and I feel guilty for not telling him. Sometimes I think Lisa is acting different, but it could be me too. I am trying not to flirt with her so much. That, and I am trying not to invade on them all of the time. I feel like I am a burden to them almost. And, they don't make it seem like that, but I just feel like I am sometimes. I don't know. I feel like shit right now.

ashatteredheart @ 2005-04-29T13:52:00

2005-04-29T17:56:00Z

Thursday was a pretty good day. Work sucked. But, I hate that place. Anyway, came home from work, and called Adam to wish him a happy birthday.

Then, I stuffed my face with leftover chinese from yesterday. Then, I showered and laid around until Adam called. Went and picked him up, and we went to Mom's house with Vicki because Theresa needed to have her pick something up.

We sat there and finished watching Meet the Fockers. Funny movie.

Came home, and did much of nothing and went to Waho. Ate, and I took him home.

Came home, and slept.

Called off Meijer because I have to work at Bolts tonight and don't feel like working for 16 hours today, or any day.

ashatteredheart @ 2005-04-27T21:58:00

2005-04-28T02:02:44Z

Wednesday: Today was pretty decent. Work was alright. I got the biggest load of the day though. Oh well. I got it done, and there wasn't much left to do.

When I got home, I layed on the couch for a bit. I was/am tired. Talked to Jay for quite a bit. Things are starting to seem normal with him and I again.

After I got off the phone with him, I played one game of baseball and Tim called. We went to the Englewood Reserve and shot shit with bb guns. Then to Best Buy.

I found the cd player I want. It's 193, so about 250 with tax, and the warranty plan. I think I am going to save 300 before I go and get it. Then, I asked the electronics rep what else I should get that would make my shit sound good, but not be loud enough so that I couldn't hear myself think. He pointed out this package with 2 10's and an amp, and it is only 205 dollars. I was like WHOA! SWEET! I will get tires first though. I need tires bad. Bought the new Mudvayne cd.

After that, Tim and I drove around. Came home, and now I am going to shower and sleep.

I want to take Adam out for his birthday tomorrow to WaHo, but I don't know what his plans are or anything like that. I will call him tomorrow after I get off work, and get home, and see what he wants to do. Who knows.

ashatteredheart @ 2005-04-26T19:05:00

2005-04-26T23:10:01Z

Tuesday: A decent day for the most part. Kind of amusing in my eyes. First off, work was okay. Most of everyone showed up today, so again, no overtime. Woo! Getting up at 6:05am still sucks, and always will.

After work, I was on my way home, and Joe called. He told me he talked to Tom, and he was going to call me tonight about the smoking weed on the line incident. He said Chris found out, and as did Scott. Carey told Chris Joe said. Which, whatever, I guess the only person there I can trust now is Joe, and of course Tom. So, fuck everyone else. Anyway, I guess Scott kind of acted like he had a guilty conscience saying blah blah, he better not mess with my job blah blah. I didn't see Scott doing it, so I obviously didn't say anything to Joe about Scott. Chris on the other hand does have a reason to be mad. Kind of. Tom did get told he was smoking weed on the line, and he is guilty of it. But, why get mad over your fuck up? Yeah, I ratted, so what. I mean, I know what I am going back to, but if I can get rid of the problem, I want too. That's that. I am not scared of Chris, and if he wants to go so low to mess with me or my car, then so be it. I am ready for whatever he wants to do.

Anyway, after that, I stopped by Francine's house and got to see everyone. I was there for about 3 hours before my patience started to run low, and I left.

Now, I am at home, I am going to do the dishes, and take a shower. Who knows after that.

ashatteredheart @ 2005-04-25T19:11:00

2005-04-25T23:28:46Z

Thursday: Work was alright. Not a big day, but still a full one. Came home, and made Lisa a mix cd. Wrote her a note to go with it, and it explained what had been wrong, and everything. Played video games, and went to bed.

Friday: Work again, was alright. I hate that place though. I stopped by Mom's on the way home, and she informed me that Eric had gotten fired from Bolts. So, I went to Bolts and talked to Tom. It is a good possibility that by the end of the summer, I will be cooking for Bolts. Came home, played more video games. MVP Baseball 2005 is addicting.

Saturday: Had to work at Bolts as dishwasher. It was good times. Not really though. Oh well. Extra money to speed up the proces of me getting a cd player in the truck. Got done at like 5, came home, and did much of well, video games. I guess Tom asked Joe about how he felt about me coming back to cook. Joe told me he told him that he was cool with it because I am reliable. Granted, I don't know a lot, but it's nothing I can't catch onto. After Joe got off, I went to his house for a bit. Came home, slept.

Sunday: Again, I had to work at Bolts. Today was a bit more interesting today. I caught Chris smoking weed on the line. I told Joe, and he said he was going to tell Tom on Tuesday. I told Joe to tell Tom that if he had any questions to give me a call. I got screwed into a double though which sucked because Adam and I were supposed to go to a show tonight. Sorry kid. Came home, showered, and sleep.

Monday: NO OVERTIME TODAY! A bunch of people called off today, but we still got what we needed to have done, finished. Came home, and played video games. Lisa came home, and now I am bothering her.

She is acting completely normal, and has e-mailed me her reaction and what not. She said she was flattered, and everything, but she had Tim. Which is great. Friends is awesome for me. Food.

ashatteredheart @ 2005-04-20T18:50:00

2005-04-20T22:53:39Z

Monday: Did a whole bunch of sleeping. I got up and went to work, but I felt like crap, so I left. Jerry said there would be no penalty until my 90 days was up, and they reviewed me. Whatever. I came home and slept until like 3:00pm. Got up, and did much of nothing. Tim came over around 8:00pm, and we were going to go see the Amityville Horror, but Joe called. They said they were going adventure golfing, but to bad the place closed at 9:00. So, we didn't end up doing anything. Watched wrestling, and went to bed.

Tuesday: Got up and went to work. My back still hurt, but I dealt with it. I put some Icy Hot on it, and away I went. Work sucked. We got stuck staying like 2 hours over. It was cool though, especially since I missed Monday. Came home, and did nothing. Took a shower, and Tim and I went adventure golfing. Came home, and went to sleep.

I did some thinking today though. Meijer is a good job and everything, but I know there is better out there. I am putting up with the same shit I did at Bolts. The only reason we were there two extra hours today is because two kids went out and smoked pot during lunch. The same exact kids fucked up the belt. I told Jerry, and all he did was say he knew. He said they have been doing it for weeks now. I just walked away. I am only making 8.10 at Meijer, when, if I go to back to Bolts, and cook, I could make 9.00. And, not have to drive 20 minutes every day, and work the hours I want. Meijers dicked me over from the start. I applied for produce, and second shift. I got stuck with General Merchandise, and first shift. Tell me why there were people in my orientation class that were being hired produce, second shift, and I wasn't?

I called Tom, and we are going to talk on Saturday.

Wednesday: Work sucked. We got stuck staying over again. Which, whatever, I made up for Monday, but I am fucking tired. On my way home, I got Wendy's for Lacey. She gets on my nerves, but I just ignore her, play video games, and yeah. Fun times. It's still better than living at home.

Now, I feel dirty, but I don't want to take a shower because my feet hurt. I am going to complain it is hot now, and it is not even May.

FUCK SUMMER!

ashatteredheart @ 2005-04-17T22:41:00

2005-04-18T02:43:44Z

Saturday: It was alright I suppose. Didn't do much of anything. Just kind of sat around playing video games.

Went to the grocery with Connie and Lisa. That was...boring.

Came home, and Mom called and said I should go to the Portwoods and visit due to the fact that the two sisters were in and I haven't seen there babies yet. So, I went over there, and did nothing. Was quiet, and left about a half hour later.

Came home and ate. I was going to do the dishes, but Lacey got to them before I did. Whatever.

Went to bed, and that was about the end of it.

Sunday: Woke up and Lisa was on the couch, and I could tell she wasn't feeling good. So, I got her a glass of water and two aspirin, and then I went to get Lacey from church. On the way back I stopped and washed the truck. After that, I started laundry and had to go to the store to get more detergent. All of the sudden, my speakers that I just bought went out on the passenger side. So, I called Best Buy, and they fixed them. No big deal. Then, I went to Francine's and sat for a few, and then I went to lunch with Mom to Bolts. It was nice. She drank....pepsi! It was cool.

From there, I went to Lisa's parents and hung out there. Lisa and I talked about how things change in such a short period of time.

For example, two years ago, I was friends with Nathan and Megan. Lisa and I barey spoke, and Tim and I talked, but small talk. Jay, Doug, and I were inseperable.

Now, Megan and Nathan are no where to be found. Neither are Doug and Jay. Lisa, Tim, and I are inseperable. Kind of weird huh?

Speaking of Megan, she came over tonight. She looks unhealthy. She lost a lot of weight, which is cool, but she just looks unhealthy. Now, I am not saying it in a bad way because I am overweight, and it looks unhealthy, but, I don't know. She just looked pale, and her face seemed a little sunk in. It was nice to sit and chat with her though.

Now, I am going to shower, and sleep. After burning a mix cd.

ashatteredheart @ 2005-04-16T16:44:00

2005-04-16T20:45:43Z

Friday: Was good, for the most part. It was the 2 year mark for Scott killing himself which still bothers me quite a bit. Work was decent. We still had a large count today which to me, was odd for a Friday. Everyone else said it was normal. Whatever. I just went about getting my work done. Around 2:15, I turned my ankle horribly bad. I didn't feel it that much though until I got home. We got out around normal time.

Came home, and limped around. Then, I was sitting around bored, so I went to Meijer and bought a MVP Baseball 2005. That game is fucking sweet. The only bad thing about baseball games though, is that the seasons are incredibly fucking long. Oh well. I'll deal with it I guess.

Mom called around 9:15. I had a headache, and my ankle was killing me, so I was already in a bad mood, but, she decided she wanted to make it worse. She tells me that instead of getting me what I want for my birthday, that she is going to put money down to pay for Francine, Jesse, and I to all have one big party. Which, is going to cost her a whole butt-load more than just getting me something and leaving it at that. But, whatever. You'll have that I guess. She asked if I was mad, and I just told her that once again, she is thinking about other people instead of what she calls "her number one" talking about me. So, I got off the phone with her and continued playing video games.

I went to sleep at like 2:00am.

ashatteredheart @ 2005-04-13T19:16:00

2005-04-14T23:25:41Z

Wednesday: Today was decent. Work kind of sucked. We had about the same amount of product as Monday and Tuesday. Whatever though. We got it all done, and didn't have to stay over. Which, when it comes to staying over, I am half and half. Yeah, I need the money, but man, I want to go home.

When I got home, Larry called and asked me to take him to Trish's because Connie had his keys, so I did. He tried giving me 5 dollars, and I threw it back at him.

Came home, showered, and then Tim and I went to Bolts to eat. It was good. I guess. From there, we went to Best Buy, and I decided I wanted to get new speakers in the Explorer since my suck! Then, I decided I was going to wait until I got paid, and get them then. Then, we left. Tim had bought the Rise and Fall of ECW dvd, and so we came home and watched that.

Then, Katy called. Her situation is fucked up. Eric, her boyfriend, got on some adult dating site, and was cheating on Katy. So, for revenge, Katy got on it to, and talked to him under a different identity. But, she called and wanted to check if he had replied, and he had. He posted a picture of their kid on the internet for this girl, who was Katy, to see. Katy hit the roof. So, she left.

Lisa, Lacey, Tim and I ordered pizza. I ate, and went to bed.

Thursday: Work was decent. I fought with myself to get out of bed though. We had a meeting this morning though. Our supervisor just thanked us for doing such a good job with it being so busy lately. Then, he just told us a few things we need to improve on.

After work, I went to Best Buy and got...NEW SPEAKERS! They sound great. I can't wait until I save up enough money to get the cd player in there too. After I get my cd player, I then think I am going to finally get new tires put on the damn thing. Notice how my priorities are backwards. I love it!

Now, I sit here doing nothing waiting on Lisa to finish making dinner so I can eat, and do the dishes. Food is good.

ashatteredheart @ 2005-04-11T19:49:00

2005-04-12T23:50:35Z

Monday: Wasn't bad. Work was decent. The conveyor was down for more than half of the second part of the day, so, again, we didn't get much done. Whatever. Came home and Lisa was home. She had the day off. So, we chilled. She made dinner, and I ate it. She made chicken, and it was really good. She is a good cook. Then, I cleaned up, and we went to Wal Mart. She had to take something back, and I wanted to go because I was bored. I ended up buying another pair of shorts, and a tshirt. Came home, watched wrestling, and fell asleep.

Tuesday: Exhausting. We had a decent size amount of work to do today, but we had about the same amount yesterday and we finished on time. Not today! Someone broke one of the fucking belts, and it was down for a good 6 hours. We had to stay an extra 2 and a half hours just to get our work done. Whatever, extra money, but, now, I am fucking tired. I don't want to move. On the way home I stopped by Mom's and had lasagna. I also got to talk to my Aunt Susan. She is cool, now. Came home, showered, and here I sit. Tired as fuck. I am thirsty, but I don't want to move. This sucks.

ashatteredheart @ 2005-04-10T00:51:00

2005-04-11T04:51:47Z

Sunday: Today was okay. I woke up around 11:30, and didn't get out of bed until 12:15. Then, Lisa and I went to her Mom's and I mowed there grass, and they fed me Subway. Mowing there grass only took me like an hour. Then, we just hung out there for a bit. Lisa left for work, and I went to Francine's for a cookout.

The cookout was boring for the most part. I ate, stayed for a half hour, and left. Came home and started laudry.

I played some more video games. Tim called me at around 8:30, and said he was on his way. He showed up, and we were bored so we went to Meijer. I bought a memory card for the PS2, and he bought a PSP. He thinks I am amd at him for it, but I am really not. I am just kind of envious. I mean, it must be nice. I decided upon something as well though. I am going to wait until the Best Buy credit card thing comes in the mail, see what the reason was. If I can't have Mom co-sign for one of those, I am going to start putting shit in lay-away. I know it won't build credit or anything, but I can still get the things I want. Like, cd player, speakers, PSP, and whatever else I decide.

For some reason, my cd burner is being dumb. I downloaded a bunch of Julianna Theory, and I went to burn it to a cd, and it is saying something is wrong. I want a new computer.

Goodnight.

ashatteredheart @ 2005-04-09T01:58:00

2005-04-10T06:04:12Z

Friday: Work was good. Got done like an hour early. Stopped by Mom's on the way home, and she was sick so I came home. I ended up taking like a 3 hour nap. Lisa woke me up complaining she was bored, and so I got up and bugged her for a bit. Tim came home, and then we went to Chinese, and to Blockbuster. We rented Smackdown vs. Raw. Sweet game. I ended up going upstairs to lay down, but didn't fall asleep until about 4. Damn MTV for having funny shows on late at night.

Saturday: Allen called and woke me up. It's cool though. He owed me money. So, I came downstairs and played some more video games. Lisa woke up soon after, and then Allen showed up. He stayed for a bit. Gave me my money, and left. Lisa had to work, so I got to stay home and play more video games. I did some laundry as well. After my laundry finally got done, I got ready and went to the Julianna Theory show. The first band was quite lame. Then some hardcore band played and I cannot remember the name. Then, I thought Open Hand was going to play, and all of the sudden I heard the Julianna Theory. So, I bolted throught the back of the crowd and sung along with the Julianna Theory. After there set I went and bought a t-shirt, poster, and cd. Sweet! After that Zao played and they were boring. During the end of their set, I was looking around, and I saw the lead singer of Julianna Theory. So, I went and talked with him for two songs. I told him he was amazing and we small talked. Then, we went to Waffle House. Tim and Lisa called, and they showed up and ate as well. I wanted Sara to be our waitress, but we didn't sit in her section.

ADAM: We are going to WaHo next Saturday, sitting in her section, and I am getting that girls number. Any questions?

Now I sit here, tired, and irritable. Goodnight.

ashatteredheart @ 2005-04-06T22:18:00

2005-04-08T02:26:18Z

Today was decent.

Work was alright. It sucked driving there. It was raining, and I could barely see anything. Anyway, they had me on mods today. I was still training though. Which, I could have done them by myself, but I took the easy way out. I did good today though. I need to pick up my pace a little bit, but I know I wasn't on rate today, so during most of it, I was taking my time. I should be alright tomorrow if they put me on mods though.

When I got home, I stopped by Mom. My bank card finally came in the mail from when I thought I lost my wallot. Then, I went to Bolts, to get my check, and then I get gas, and went to Best Buy. I bought A Static Lullaby, Sinch, Thrice, and Straylight Run. I haven't gone cd shopping in so long. In a nerdy way, I was excited.

After that, I came home and ate some spaghetti and dozed off in the recliner. Lisa came home and woke me up. I paid cable, and my phone. Then, I did the dishes. Then Lisa and I went to her Mom's I am going to mow there grass for them on Sunday. Then, from there, we went to Big Lots. I bought socks, and some pens. Then, to Wal Mart. I bought a pair of work shoes, and a pair of jean shorts. And, a little folder thing to keep receipts from bills and stuff.

Now, I want to take a shower, organize my cd's, watch Family Guy, and go to bed.

ashatteredheart @ 2005-04-05T19:27:00

2005-04-06T23:30:58Z

Today wasn't bad. I had to work, but I am poor, so it was definitley not a bad thing. Anyway, Kyle and Cortney didn't show up, so I had to work with Ryan. Which, he is cool in all, except that all he talks about is how he is so tired from going out and drinking the night before. Do I care if he goes out the night before? No. He needs to just shut up and work. Anyway, it was a slow day. We got done like 15 minutes early or something.

Came home, and went to Mom's but she had to take Russel Jr, who now lives there, to the bank. I'm not real bothered by it, except for the fact that he is getting charged less than what I was. Whatever though. I am happy just where I am at. Then, I went to Francine's. Nothing there. So, I came home, shit, shaved, and showered, and then I went to the bank for them to tell me I needed a co-signer for a loan. Mom said she would co-sign, which surprised the fucking shit out of me. So, I am supposed to pick her up tomorrow, and take her with me to the bank. That should be fun. Then, I came home. Some neighborhood kids approached me and asked me to be there quarterback so they could play football. I was like sweet. Little kids with energy rule. So, I went abd played football for about a half hour with some little kids. Then, Tryna called and I told her I was going to come over. Well, about half way there, she called and said not to, she wasn't feeling good. I don't think that was the reason, but whatever. So, I went to Stacy's work, and bugged her for a few. It was good times to see her face light up like a christmas tree when she saw me. Anyway, and now I sit at home, a little irritated with Lacey.

She cooked spaghetti, which is fine. Except for the fact that we still have some left from the last time Lisa cooked it frozen in the freezer, but she decided not to look. So, now, we have a buttload of spaghetti just sitting there. I don't get her sometimes, but whatever.

It's video game time.

ashatteredheart @ 2005-04-04T23:14:00

2005-04-06T03:23:34Z

Monday: Decent day. Work sucked for the first time though. I had to work with Kyle. I have nothing against gay people at all. Male or female. But, this kid was so fucking whiny, it was sickening. He wouldn't lift anything. So, my back was killing me. I got home, and laid down. My Mom called, and invited me over for dinner, so I went over there after taking a shower. Then, I went to Allen's house, and picked up my cd's, and talked with him for a few. Then, I went to my Aunt Toni's house, and she gave me like 4 towels. Then, I came home. I was going to watch wrestling, but I fell asleep.

Tuesday: Work was better today. Cortney was there, but they took me away from her. They put me in a module today. They aren't bad, but screen off is so much easier. Oh well. Whatever. I finally got my pay stuff figured out from there. They owe me 10 hours of pay from my Orientation, and then after this check, everything will be directly deposited into my account. Which is sweet. So, after work today, I went to Mom's again. She started complaining about having to take care of Ricky, Russel, and Russel Jr. It's funny. In a sense, she gets what she deserves. If she wouldn't have been so much of a damn bitch, it could be possible that I would still be living there. Then, I came home. I then, went to Joe's to drop off cd's, and then to Bolts to give Tom Lisa's number, then to Blockbuster to drop movies off, then to Long John's Silver to get food, then I came home. Ate, and then tried downloading a new cd programming, but I have no patience today, so that didn't work. Then, Tim and I went to Wal Mart, and then to Lisa's work. Then, to UDF, and now we are home. I need to take a shower, and go to bed. I am fucking tired.

I forgot to call Joanna today, but she said it was okay because she is sick.

Girls suck.

ashatteredheart @ 2005-04-03T00:17:00

2005-04-04T04:20:35Z

Today was alright. Lisa's Mom came over, and put up some curtains for us. She had to hem them, that is why we needed her help. But, they look really nice.

Anyway, Tim and I went half on Wrestlemania. Yeah, I know, we're lame. It was good fun though. The Red Sox took an ass kickin' tonight, which sucks.

This whole Lisa thing, is done. I still feel for her a lot, but, I am not telling her, and that is the end of it. Me telling her how I feel isn't going to do any good. What I mean is, she won't break up with Tim. I think the only thing that would came out of this, is that I would piss of Tim. Something, I don't want/need to do. So, there, that is the end of that.

I talked to Joanna the other night. We are supposed to hang out Tuesday.

Megan and Lindsey called me tonight. I think I might try and get them to come over sometime. Even though, Megan and I haven't talked in awhile, I need to stop being childish about the whole thing.

I have to work all this week. They will put me on a "mod" sometime this week. I am kind of excited, but kind of nervous as well. Who knows, we will see what happens.

ashatteredheart @ 2005-04-02T14:42:00

2005-04-03T18:44:16Z

I can't keep it a secret anymore. I have to tell one of them. If not both of them. They both know something is up, but they both think it is with someone else. I hate the fact that I am keeping something from them. I want to tell them, but I would just hope they understand. I mean, it's not an attempt to break them up or anything like that. I cannot help who I feel for.

Lisa, I think she would probably just laugh it off, and act like it never happened. Which, in a sense, would piss me off, but, I don't want it to bother her, or make things weird at all.

Tim, I think he would probably be a little bothered with it. I know he would make jokes about it, because that is how he makes himself feel comfortable with a situation, and that would make me feel even worse. I don't want him to feel like he can't trust me or something like that.

This completely sucks. I can't tell one, and not the other. If I told one of them, I know the other would find out. That's just how they are.